I Wander Lonely as a Seed


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Today I feel like
a dandelion seed
puffed onto the breeze
a little thing
of no consequence
floating in
stillness,
hanging in space,
surrounded by
so much
nothing-
ness.

Lonely
I wander
as a seed.

 
Today I feel such homesickness
I cry to my kin
“Will we be together again?”
I cry and I howl
tears, snot,
my soul running out of me,
unbearable the agony
of being orphaned.
 
All around me strange faces
that scare me in their stupor,
torpid looks of sleep walkers,
marionettes moving in a relentless wave,
a numbing tide in
a dreamscape like a fun house mirror
without the fun.

Today I feel like
a walking chest wound
perhaps like the ripping tear of a heart attack
or shrapnel blast, sharp and fine
making mincemeat of me,
shredding the tender petals of
my heart.

 
Today I want journey’s end
to see the finishing line,
bright and beckoning
a doorway opening wide
Exit Here
and a glimpse over the threshold
a sea of peace
a serene sky
a soft field of green
for the tired traveller to
lie down in .
 
Soon, soon I will rest my weariness
I will know the joy of homecoming
the arms of siblings not embraced for eons,
and I will sit beside my beloved and lean into
a love that needs no speech
no flowers or chocolates
no bended knee
no bands of gold
no pre-nuptial,
and I will drown in an ocean of liquid light
a living fire that burns away all remains of the dirt and wear
of long and arduous travel, the smudge, the scar, the bruise, the tear, the bone deep memory of pain,
gone forever.
 
 
 
 
 
*Thanks to Wordsworth
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